Ask, Don't Assume

I have always assumed the most important things my kids wanted for Christmas and the holidays is a giant pile of gifts, that a lot of small things with good playing power would be preferred to a large gift. But you know what happens when you assume...

A week or so ago, my son went to a birthday party and the little boy only received one big gift from his parents. My son was smitten. I asked my kids for the first time if they would like one large gift or a bunch of smaller gifts. Surprise! They both wanted one larger gift!

So, that was a shocker. I guess my point here, is don't assume! Your kids are people who will continue to develop and change. Consider keeping the line of communication open on the questions that you normally would just assume.

Think about it and see what impact you can have!

Maria

Polite Kids - Table Manners

I just found this wonderful new blog called Hybrid Mom. Hybrid Mom has a fantastic acronym for table manners. Take a look!

POLITE
Pull out the chair and sit squarely in the seat
Open napkin and put it in your lap
Let the host start eating before you do
I use silverware correctly
Talk to others and make nice conversation
Excuse yourself before leaving the table




Hybrid mom, you are brilliant! Thanks for a great tip. And here is my two cents. Every day all through the holidays....that will give you a good month, repeat the acronym POLITE at each meal and what the letters mean. The kids will get it committed to memory and and so will you. In no time you can have those dream kids you are desperately hoping for at dinnertime!

Check out Hybrid Mom's full article and blog page here!

Bonding - Family Reads

Why not pick a classic book favorite of yours and develop a "family reads" time of day? Right now, my son and I read every nite at bedtime. It has been a Percy Jackson fest. But we both look forward to our time together.

In the past, I have read Island of the Blue Dolphins with my daughter, Jonathon Livingston Seagull with both my kids. Can you believe my son got the symbolism?

This holiday season as the air gets cold, why not light a fire and read some of your favorite stories with your kids?

You might just open up a whole new world - for all of you.

Remember to believe in the value of your every contribution!

Maria

Bonding - Me and You and You and Me

Here's a quick tip. Find one thing that you can do with each of your children. It is something that just the two of you share. Simple. I am teaching my youngest chess. It's great. He's learning how to think critically and we have something really intimate to share.

Find one thing that the two of you share and protect it. I remember watching ER every Thursday night with my step-daughter. We would curl up under some covers and watch it every week. It was "our thing".

This is a great way to bond, have fun and take a time out in an all too busy world.

Have a great week and remember the power of your every contribution!

Maria

Back to School Tips

Back to school is the time to put some structure in place. Take a look at these three simple ways to get back to the grind and be more organized.

1. Have kids lay out clothes each night.

2. Create an AM and PM checklist for the kids. Hey, while you are at it, make one for yourself.

Ideas for AM/ PM checklist:

Straighten room
Put away dirty laundry
Check backpack
Lay out clothes
Make bed


Make lunches at night, not in the morning! But here is the news. Do NOT put the lunches inside an insulated lunch box in the fridge. The insulated bag will keep the cold of the fridge OUT. Those lunch boxes are fine if you use them for the 2-3 hours before lunch but will prevent the fridge from doing its job overnight.


Put a few systems in place. Your kids might moan and groan at first, but guaranteed, they will feel more in control and happy once they adjust!

Maria

Parents Can Have Summer Fun, Too!

Summer is coming to a close already. Have you been able to stop and do some special things with the kids? Here is a list of things to get your creative juices flowing. Summer is a great opportunity not just to be with our kids, but to be one, too.

Get to a pool. And why not do cannon balls with your kids?

Go out for ice cream and wander through your downtown or one of a neighboring town. And make sure you get a cone for yourself!

Go to the local pet store and play with the puppies. You can even talk about the breeds with the kids if you want to make it educational.

Find a water park and make sure you go down some of those slides, too.

Spend an afternoon at the library with the kids. Come back to the house, bake some cookies and everyone can read their new stuff and nibble. No TV!

What can you come up with in the dog-days of summer to do with your kids?

Maria

Movie Review Toy Story: Something for Everyone

I had the great pleasure of taking the family to see Toy Story last week. This movie swept away three generations of us. It captured the kids, myself and brought me an extra dose of joy to hear my mom chuckling throughout the movie.

This is, I believe, the best of the franchise. Letting go, passing on the torch, loyalty, sacrifice, friendship are all root themes. There is so much material in this movie, from bullying to bad choices to growing up and humility, parents will have fodder for helping their children using the examples of different characters in this movie for years to come.

Oh, and Ken will make you cry with laughter. Characters like Buttercup and Big Baby will all conjure up memories of our own childhood's. Prepare to shed a tear, just out of the beauty of the movie's messages. This is a winner for all. You will laugh and cry and somewhere, deep inside of you, that child who loved to play will come out for a bit. You will definitely want to sit on the floor with your kids and the Barbie camper or the action figures after this one.

Book Review: Get Out of My Life, but first could you drive Cheryl and I to the mall?

This is probably my favorite book for parents to read as their child is barreling down on adolescence. Get Out of My Life, but first could you drive me and Cheryl to the mall? is first and foremost, a priceless title. For anyone going through adolescence with a child, they know exactly what living that title feels like.

You need this book:
1. If you think you are going crazy with your teen or pre-teen
2. If you no longer recognize your child
3. If you are beginning to wonder if you are the world's worse parent
4. If you want to give your child a boot
5. If nothing is working at home

What I love about this book:
1. It educates you in layman terms, exactly what is happening with your child
2. It shows you how to be more patient
3. It teaches you what behavior is not "personal," just normal behavior of a child spreading their wings

This is a classic and with humor, education and good solid advise, helps us parents do our job even better as we all survive the adolescent years.

Check it out here.

Authored by Anthony E. Wolf.

Movie Review: Aliens in the Attic: Great Family Nite Fun

This movie is a favorite in our house. It is silly and a little scary and really quite sweet. The premise? A groups of kids at a family reunion do battle with a bunch of aliens (in the attic). Of course the evil alien's weapons only work on adults, so the adults must be kept away from them and kept in the dark. It's funny and sweet and I particularly like that the usual strife between the "smart kid" and the "brawny kid" dissipates at the very beginning of the movie. The kids all work together, are compassionate toward each other and act as a team. Plus, if you do pick this one up, make sure you watch after the credits for "Funky Ricky." You won't regret it. So pop the corn, curl up on the couch and put in a movie the whole family will enjoy.

Time Out for Parents - Three Quick Tips

We all know how important time outs are for our kids. Today, I just wanted to remind all us parents to stop a little bit each day and take some time for ourselves. There is nothing wrong with stopping to get our center back and everything wrong with not doing that.

Here are three simple ways to slow down.

"Mommy" or "Daddy" time.
I take small increments and tell my kids I am having "mommy time." I might grab a glass of flavored seltzer, kick back in my bedroom, read a chapter of a book, look at my favorite magazine, even have a cat nap. I feel great and refreshed after a few minutes and it teaches my kids boundaries. But, keep in mind your kids' ages. Mine are older, 9 and 13, and able to be unsupervised.

Get yourself a backup
My mom is one of my backups. She has been around to help me with carpooling, when I have to run to the market, etc. And when I need a break? She tells me, "Add a little time for you, honey." So,I might stop at a store, take a quick walk, or grab something from the coffee shop. Nice.

The Cushion
When you are running your errands, working, dropping off kids, add in a cushion. Stop and do something you love in the midst of all your maintenance work. Do you love art? Stop at an art gallery during lunch or after dropping off kids. Schedule library time for YOU. Consider joining a team. I was on a "mom's soccer league" for awhile. It was a blast. I almost had a coronary twice a week. But it was different and about me!



Remember to take the time to stop today, even just for a two-minute time out every now and then and get back to center.